Tidal

14 Sep

All these bars we’ve closed
and all the burned bridges,
all these scars that remain
even after removed stitches,
we both know what this is
despite our attempts to deny,
I’ve wasted all these tears
chasing you down streets
of wasted years and leftover
feelings of hanging on tight,
and yet here I am still fighting
for you and me to be excused
for being caught in the middle,
of our own shit that won’t subside
and can you blame me for trying,
can you blame me for caring
and never giving up on this
tide that’s just now turning.

Abandoned

10 Sep

Sometimes
there are
moments,
during the day,
in which I feel as if
my muse has left me;
not simply inspiration
taking a needed break,
or my thoughts taking time
trying to find some answers,
but that it just left me, empty,
like a house, that’s vacant inside,
nothing to seek or find anymore,
like a mind abandoned beneath
the creaky wooden floorboards,
an afterthought, gathering dust,
or a limb that’s withered away,
wasted and taking up space,
displacing the emptiness yet
never really taking it’s place.

Meant to be

6 Aug

I miss the kiss
of your lips,
the curve
of your hips,
the small
of your back
and your long
black hair.
I miss the way
that you fit
into my arms as if
we were always
meant to be a pair.

Jumper

5 Aug

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It’s a perfect night
for a suicide,
I’m jumping off, diving
tired of hiding
all this pain inside,
tonight’s the night,
it’s time for me
to finally die

Gone

1 Aug

I’ve never felt so
hopelessly alone,
so utterly ignored,
unthought of
and unknown.
I want to disappear,
vanish without a trace,
leave no memory of me,
I just want to be erased.

EMMA

28 Jul

I despise the way
you smile at me
as you fucking lie
through your teeth,
and I grieve the loss
of your honesty
as I witness you
murdering the truth.
This brutal betrayal
conveys your indifference
and I wish that you’d
split the difference in two
and leave me alone,
instead of destroying
what’s left of my soul
by toying with me
until you get bored.

Damages

27 Jul

Even though
I know it’s cracked,
somewhere deep
within your heart
is a light that shines
through all the black,
but the hurtful words
hurled from your lips,
sunk in too deep
to be taken back.

Black hole

24 Jul

I used to have
a soul,
but it was
systematically removed
and replaced
by a fucking,
sucking, vacuous
black hole.

It’s like……That

21 Jul

Love is like…
…going home,
it’s that feeling
of belonging,
to someone…
…or somewhere
you can be yourself
without having to
ever be alone,
a place where
you are wanted
despite your darkest
secrets being known.

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Reprobate

21 Jun

I’ve been told that
I write too much
about love,
there seems to be
those who’d prefer
more hardcore sex,
or maybe even poems
about the vast emptiness
of my own existence,
the deep, dark hole
of my depression,
which I fill with whiskey
and prescription medication,
what about the nameless whores
I fill up with my erections,
these women I degrade
to satiate my own frustrations,
how about the countless hours
I wile away in solitude,
a sulking suicidal mood,
contemplating my demise and
your utter lack of surprise when,
contrary to your wishes,
I continue to keep living
so I can write another love poem,
just because I know you
find it so fucking sickening.

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